Down but not out

So to say have I not posted in a while is an understatement. It has been almost two years.  And it has been a very rough almost two years. One thing after another combined to knock me down again and again.

I won't bore you with all the details. Just that I was hit with major blows in all areas of my well being. Financial, mental, medical, family, etc. There were good times of course, but they seemed few and far between. My health took a turn for the worse and I ended up with frequent emergency room visits for severe asthma flare ups. I had to pretty much withdraw from life as I knew it to try and stabilize my breathing. And the final blow was when my mom, my rock, passed away a few months ago.

It is like being down a dark dirt hole and having the dirt bury you deeper each time you try and climb out.

I am still feeling like that some days but the major turning point is that I am slowly regaining my determination to not let my health get the better of me.   After many many doctor visits, my asthma is starting to respond to my new treatment plan. I am back on pain medication for my chronic pain, which I hate but it is a necessary evil while I can not exercise.

Any unlike so many others, I have the support of a loving family who, while they may not truly understand what it is like to be me, they believe in me and are there for me no matter how hard it is.

So in the words of Thomas Jefferson, I plan to : "Do what you can with what you have, where you are. "

I may be down but I am not out. I will work my way back into the life I want. One day at a time.